Sometimes I really like when everything sucks.
And no, I’m not crazy. Or at least no more crazy than usual.
What I mean is that when projects, jobs, connections, groups, don’t work, and it becomes super clear that they’re not working, it’s easy to know what to let go of. It’s easy to enter that life process called flow.
Lately, I’ve had a lot of things not working. How do I know they’re not working? There’s no joy in it. And I love letting go of whatever makes me unhappy. LOVE! It’s the most affirmative thing ever. I let go, saying whoosh, no joy in it. Bye-bye. And in doing this, I am also saying, I want joy, I deserve joy, I can have joy. I just have to choose. I just have to reach out to the world with both hands and a stupidly open heart. I just have to say, what works makes me ALIVE.
I could go into specifics, but one of the things that’s not working is all the bus rides to New York for auditions, networking, pay to plays, etc. The bus rides so exhaust me…and lately I’ve had the 7 and 8 hour rides because of traffic and why do they keep taking 95 in the summer? Don’t they learn?
Anyhow, I’m not going into the lovely specifics today because I need a nap. I’ve just done restorative yoga and meditated, so a nap is definitely the next step. Toward well-being, joy, and general laziness.
I love to let go. Because it means I’ve stopped trying to make it happen, trying to control the outcome, and I can just be. Me. Which is good enough.